A clarification and some definitions

Note: I first posted this article shortly after the 2020 U.S. presidential election. But with another election season in progress, I’d like to run it again with just a couple of small updates, because it still reflects my feelings about the polarization ripping apart our society.

When I express my desire to step back from the Culture Wars and find less-polarizing ways of addressing societal problems or controversies, I get a pair of common responses.

Some folks who identify as progressive will say sarcastically, “Oh, I see. You think we should all be NICE.” They practically spit out the word nice, then accuse me of wanting to look the other way in the face of injustice. Some who identify as conservative will suggest that what I really want is for everyone to simply ignore sinful behavior and “wink at sin.”

My first spiritual director – a wise woman who had a talent for posing questions most people don’t think to ask – challenged me with this question: “What, exactly, do you mean by Culture Wars?” And this one: “What would you consider to be polarizing behavior?” She made an important point. Those words may not mean the same thing to everyone who hears them.

So I’d like to clarify: When I speak of the Culture Wars and the resulting polarization in our society, I’m not talking about honest disagreements between people of good will who just happen to have differing ideas about the best way to resolve issues. I’m not saying we should look the other way in the face of injustice or cease discussing sin in sermons, Bible study sessions and religious education classes. I’m not suggesting we should retreat from the political arena, refrain from sharing our opinions about issues we feel strongly about, forsake our favorite causes or stop working to resolve problems such as poverty and hunger.

When I speak of the Culture Wars and the resulting polarization in our society, I am talking about the trolling, the name-calling, the insults, the character assassination, the demonizing and scapegoating, and the gratuitous rudeness that have become a mind-numbingly routine part of our daily conversations and social media interactions. I’m talking about activist groups doctoring videos and jerking quotes out of context to make ideological opponents look sinister, candidates for public office deliberately playing on fears and divisions to score political points and get votes, ordinary folks combing through comments on Facebook or X (formerly known as Twitter) looking for “gotcha” opportunities so they can pounce, and extremists phoning in death threats to people who say or do something they disagree with.

Dictionary.com defines Culture War as “a conflict or struggle for dominance between groups within a society, or between societies, arising from their differing beliefs and practices.” Wikipedia points out that “in American usage the term culture war may imply a conflict between those values considered traditionalist or conservative and those considered progressive or liberal.” Dictionary.com defines polarization as “a sharp division, as of a population or group, into opposing factions.” Urban Dictionary defines culture warrior as “a member of one of the two major political tribes who have come to dominate political discussion in the U.S. with their divisive, polarizing conflict.”

A key concept for me in these definitions is dominance. All too often, the competing factions in our Culture Wars aren’t so much concerned with actually resolving issues as they are with winning – at any cost – by humiliating and annihilating people perceived to be their opponents. These “opponents” are no longer simply misguided or mistaken, they are stupid, crazy or just plain evil.

When I express my desire to step back from the Culture Wars, I also get another common response. Some equally exhausted folks enthusiastically nod their heads and suggest I should turn off the TV, log off the Internet and disengage from the larger society. Some will argue that even talking about politics or hot-button social issues is poor etiquette. That getting involved in causes is the province of people afraid to look too closely at their personal problems. That marches, rallies and boycotts are inherently divisive. That civil discussion is a waste of time since most of us already have our minds made up. That special interests control our government to the point where voting is futile, so why bother?

I would respectfully disagree with the idea of simply “dropping out.” The Constitution guarantees our right to petition our government for the redress of grievances. Participating in the political process is not only a right, but one of our responsibilities as citizens. Supporting a good cause with our time or money beats sitting in front of our screens mindlessly doomscrolling on the Internet or using our social media posts for performative virtue signaling that substitutes for rolling up our sleeves. Too many problems need addressing for us to move in the direction of apathy and disconnection. We do need to stay engaged.

But could we please, please, please stop the vitriol? If we really want to change hearts and minds, we must stop the name-calling, the scapegoating and the demonizing. It’s one thing to write a politely-worded letter to an elected official. It’s another to send a profanity-laced screed containing death threats. It’s one thing to attend a candidate forum or town hall meeting and ask an intelligent question when it’s our turn to do so. It’s another to shout down a lawmaker or candidate who is trying to speak. It’s one thing to participate in a march or rally in which organizers have obtained all the proper permits. It’s another to vandalize property, set fire to a police station or bomb a clinic.  

Name-calling and other rude behavior stop genuine discussion and problem solving in their tracks. Lashing out gives others an excuse to ignore our concerns, discount us and dismiss our issues. For those of us who claim to be people of faith, spewing snarky insults gives people ammunition to call us hypocrites and declare they want nothing to do with either us or our religion. And violence only begets more violence.

In my own case, I actually have changed my mind now and then over the years, even on some fairly important issues. When I did so, it was because someone presented factual information in such a way that I could listen without becoming defensive. It also helped if the other person was willing to hear my side of the story, shared their personal experience of the issue in question, or showed me how I could come around to their way of thinking without sacrificing important values.

But I can promise I have never, EVER changed my mind about anything because someone called me names, insulted me or tried to convince me they were morally superior to me. All yelling and character assassination ever did for me was encourage me to dig in my heels or walk away. People of all political stripes have let me know I’m not alone in this regard.

In our current environment, we are so often presented with only two alternatives – be “in-your-face” reactionary or be apathetic. I’d like to see a third option. I’d like to see all of us eliminate the name-calling, the trolling and the flaming, and have a respectful discussion about serious issues. We need to replace our desire to be right and come out on top with a desire to solve problems. That way, instead of “our side” winning, perhaps we can all win.

Questions for readers: Have you found a constructive way to address pressing social issues without getting caught up in the vitriol that characterizes the Culture Wars? I’d love to hear your response to this question, as well as your comments on this article. Just hit “Leave a Reply” below. When responding, please keep in mind the guidelines I’ve outlined on my Rules of Engagement page (link HERE).

25 thoughts on “A clarification and some definitions

  1. I pray MANY people “just happen” to be led to your article and find themselves drawn to the wisdom of your suggestions, Debi Sue. We’ve reached a point of widespread disrespect, egocentrism, condemnation of others, and dishonesty. May we Christians in particular lead the way back to less-vitriolic times. Lord, help us!

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Bravo! Well said. This nation has serious problems. Further division will not solve those. That requires involvement by serious-minded individuals willing to listen to all sides of an issue. Demagogues are interested only in their own advancement.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Debi Sue, it IS disturbing to see the hatred spewed in both directions. I will be posting something soon that was written in the 1950’s but is eerily familiar today – how to bring down a democracy. Step 1 is to divide the populace. It would appear that the enemy of our souls is succeeding in that step, and others. 😕

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I agree.

    I, too, am very grieved over the name calling and character assassination that is going on today. Our Lord says to honor ALL men, and what a different world this would be if every person took His words to heart. It’s going to be a wonderful day when our Lord comes and it is so.

    May you know I treasure and admire you, my sister…. His light is very apparent in you. 🌟

    ❤️Your Sister

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Until I read your post Debi Sue, I had not considered much of what I’m going to share with you, and it’s my hope that you will give my words some thought:

    The law is perfect, righteous, and holy, eh? but God knew when He gave it, no one could keep it…..He also knew it would not go well for the Israelites when they chose a king instead of having God as their head. He “went along with it,” but it wasn’t His will. He allowed them to have their choice (King Saul) letting them find out for themselves what MAN’s rule would cost them.

    The constitution of the United States was inspired by God,…. and wonderful laws that agreed with the righteous laws of God were adopted. It was because man was not yet ready in his WILL for God’s total rule (a theocracy,) God “allowed” the government of the USA to be a government ruled BY THE PEOPLE, for the people (a democracy.) He was well aware that it could only go well as long as the majority of the people were God-fearing and willing to do things HIS way. Yes, He lets us ALL of us go our own way until we realize we need a SAVIOR, and we and countries sure make a mess of it: Just read history and the scriptures…. especial the Book of Daniel that states ONLY the kingdom of God is going to survive in the end.

    The Bible says that “IN THE DAY of His power, we shall be made willing.” (Psalm 110: 3) Yay, we will know THEN that we need HIM to rule us, and THAT day is the day when HIS JUDGMENTS are on the earth. Another word for judgment is “crisis” and I believe that great, GREAT judgments are at the door NOW because our sins have reached to the high heaven. But as bad as it will be on all our FLESH, it’s the time we will learn RIGHTEOUSNESS…. and I say “hallelujah”! for afterward, we shall rejoice.

    I have a question to ask you, but first I want to remind you that it was God Who raised up Pharaoh. Do you believe that God will put in government whom HE WILLS, (Psalm 75: 7)or do you believe that the votes of multitudes of people are going to determine who will rule. Think about it: MORE than half the people in America do not know God and many who do know Him are doing their own will…. Do you honestly think they have the sense to make good decisions for our country or for themselves?

    The Bible clearly gives the solution for the healing and the prosperity of our country and it is NOT through the votes of people or LAWS. 2 Chron. 7: 14 states: “If MY people who are called by My name will humble themselves, and pray and seek My face, and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin and heal their land.” We are NOT citizens of this world and there are NO politics in heaven where our citizenship is. We are strongly admonished to not allow the cares of this world into our lives, because cares steal the Word of God of God from us. Ecclesiastes 1:14 states that all in this world is vanity and vexation of spirit? Know of a certainty that the systems of this world (Babylon) are going to be destroyed and everyone who has tried to heal Babylon (make the systems of this world work thinking they can change and build them up) are going to find themselves in great confusion and peril.

    As it was in the days of Noah, so shall it be in the end, but it will be with fire, not water that the wicked will be removed. And while the fires are burning seven times hotter then ever before, we will be in the midst of them UNTOUCHED, with not even a hair of our heads will burned…. However, this will be true only for those whom the Lord JESUS Christ is LORD and MASTER-…. only for those who are TOTALLY surrendered.

    Hear it: “ For behold, the day shall come that shall burn like an oven, And all the proud, yes, all who do wickedly will be stubble. And the day which is coming shall burn them up,” Says the LORD of hosts, “That will leave them neither root nor branch.” (Mal. 4: 1) And after THIS the kingdom of God shall reign on earth!

    I highly respect you Debi Sue, and know by the Spirit of God that you are a loving, god-fearing woman, but as wise as your wisdom is and as deeply heartfelt your concern is, you are eating the fruit from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, wrapped up in the affairs of this world, just as most Christians seem to be. Oh that we would be healing the sick, casting out demons and raising the dead, preaching the gospel to the lost…. and especially spending time on our knees before Him getting completely transformed into His image. Oh God help us!
    🙏✝️Michele

    Liked by 1 person

    • I would agree that God is neither a Democrat nor a Republican, and that God’s will transcends politics and (human-made) political parties and ideologies. I also believe that while we may not be “of this world,” God has definitely placed us in it and we should not hide our light under a bushel. We are to be salt and light, and part of that is to not get caught up in the insults and name-calling and character assassination that make up so much of our culture wars, but to show, by our example, a better way.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. I’m fortunate enough to be making my statements in poetry, which represents the common emotional experiences we all have, whatever our political persuasions. When I’m asked for my political opinions I say I’m in favor love. The more we see our commonalities, the more we will address common issues in that awareness. There must be some who carry out each part of the great American mechanism for growth and evolution ~ that’s mine.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Excellent article!! I find myself, once again, in complete agreement with you. Sadly, I have not found a way, yet, to engage without having something thrown in my face in a pretty hostile manner. This leads me to not try to engage at all, at least on social media, which is a hotbed of trolling, these days. What’s really sad is that the name-calling doesn’t stop at politics. Our current environment has emboldened people to call anyone who doesn’t agree with them about anything “stupid,” “idiot,” or worse. I confess that those words might cross my mind, sometimes, but I never express them either verbally or in print.

    I find it very sad that we have a group of people who see no problem with a VP candidate telling a Presidential candidate to “go to hell.” How is civil discourse even possible in this case?

    The hypocrisy I see coming from alleged “Christian” circles hurts my soul. It really does. I grieve for the state of the Church. I have faith that she will ultimately be fine, because the true Church is made up of true followers of Christ. But she’s getting a bad rap, right now because of some folks.

    I sincerely thank you for these articles, Debi Sue. You are an oasis of rationality in a desert of fear, hatred, and confusions.

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